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Hey—it’s Clay.

It’s easy to forget that when work takes up so much of your time, energy, and identity. But when you zoom out, it’s clear: what matters most isn’t your title or your to-do list. It’s how you show up in the quiet, ordinary moments that don’t make your résumé.

Today’s Kindling is all about slowing down and paying attention to those moments—the deep cuts of life that are easy to skip when you’re always in a hurry.

You’ll find a quick reset across the Core Five, a powerful quote, one of my favorite books on reclaiming your time (The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry), and a practice that might change how you listen—both to music and to life.

Let’s get into it. 🔥

Your Paycheck Isn’t Your Purpose. Your impact is.

It’s easy to tie your identity to your job. But when you zoom out, you realize the real markers of a meaningful life aren't found in your title or bank account—they’re found in how you show up in the areas that matter most.

Here’s a quick reset across the Core Five:

🟠 Family
Your job puts food on the table.
Your presence builds the legacy.

Would your family describe you as present, engaged, and leading them well?

🟡 Purpose
Your values don’t just belong on paper.
They should shape how you live.

Would the people closest to you say you actually live by what you claim to believe?

🟢 Growth
If you’re only growing in your career—but not in your character—you’re falling short.

Without your job, what still makes you feel like you’re becoming a better man?

🔵 Health
You can’t lead well if you’re constantly drained.
Fuel the body and mind that carry your purpose.

Are you treating your health as an asset—or an afterthought?

⚫ Simplicity
The world’s full of noise.
Strip it back. Focus on what matters.

What’s one distraction you can cut this week to make more space for what’s important?

What Actually Counts
You want real, unshakable purpose? Start measuring your life differently.

Track conversations with your wife.
Track how often you’re truly there for your kids.
Track your integrity, your peace, your consistency.

When your career is over, those are the things that will still matter.

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Quote of the week

Most guys stay busy doing crap that doesn’t matter—because it’s easy, it’s urgent, or someone else expects it. Purpose doesn’t show up in your inbox. You’ve got to cut the noise, get clear, and protect what matters. Ruthlessly.

Resources worth your time

The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

This week’s Spark and Kindling are all about slowing down—taking time to actually sit with things instead of rushing past them.

But let’s be honest: that’s hard to do when your days already feel packed.

If you’re constantly stuck in “catch-up mode,” one of the best books I’ve read on reclaiming your time and attention is The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer.

It’s not just about productivity—it’s about presence. Comer makes a compelling (and convicting) case that hurry is one of the greatest threats to living a deeply meaningful life. He explores how slowing down isn’t laziness—it’s a discipline. One that creates space for better conversations, deeper relationships, and spiritual clarity.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re skimming the surface of your own life, this book is a powerful guide for shifting gears.

It’s part of the official Campfire Gentleman reading list—find more recommendations at:
👉 Check out the list

On the Record

On Monday, I talked about how this year I decided to listen to one album front to back—no skipping, no bouncing around—each month.

It’s a small practice in attention. Just sitting with something long enough to hear what you’d usually miss.

Here’s what I’ve listened to so far:

• Nightmare – Avenged Sevenfold

• Hail to the King – Avenged Sevenfold

• The Stage – Avenged Sevenfold (What? They’ve got lots of deep cuts!)

• Bloom – Larkin Poe

• Discovery – Daft Punk

• Higher – Chris Stapleton

Along the way, a few songs stopped me in my tracks:
“Victim,” “Fiction,” “Crimson Day,” and “Roman Sky” (Avenged Sevenfold),
“Little Bit” (Larkin Poe),
“Something About Us” (Daft Punk),
and “White Horse” (Chris Stapleton).

Might not change your life. But it changes how you listen.

The Real Win

Not doing more.
Not climbing faster.
But being fully present in the places that matter most.

That’s the real work.

So here’s the challenge:

👉 Take five minutes tonight and ask yourself: What am I measuring?
If it’s all tied to your job, it might be time to reset.

Start tracking something that actually counts.

Because one day, your legacy won’t be built on promotions or paychecks.
It’ll be built on presence.

Until next time—
Keep the fires burning,
— Clay

If you’re digging Campfire Gentleman, check out a few other newsletters I actually read and recommend. No fluff—just solid stuff from like-minded guys trying to build something that matters.