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Hey—it’s Clay

Let’s be honest…
Most of us are wired to look for the shortcut.
The quick fix. The easy win.

But the truth?
A lot of the stuff that matters most—marriage, parenting, health, building something meaningful—
it’s rarely easy. And it’s never quick.

That’s what this week’s Kindling is about:

📌 Letting go of the illusion of “easy”
📌 Embracing effort without resentment
📌 Showing up—even when it’s the last thing you feel like doing

No gimmicks. No grindset. Just a mindset shift that makes the hard stuff… doable.

Let’s get into it. 🔥

Hard Stuff Gets Easier When You Stop Expecting It to Be Easy (And Other Lessons from Building Fences)

The continuing series: Things I’ve Learned in the First Quarter of Middle Age (That I Probably Should’ve Already Known). I’m a little heavy on parentheticals today.

My brother and I have a running joke: anytime we ask Dad for help with a project—installing an electrical outlet, replacing a dining room floor, building a horse fence (all real things that happened)—he always says the same thing:

Which we now know means: It’s gonna take all day.

Case in point: the horse fence.
I already had the T-posts down, so it was just stretching wire, right?

Eight hours, a bleeding thumb, a few bruises, and forearms covered in poison ivy later… we’re done.

But here’s the truth: I don’t get frustrated anymore.
Because I’ve learned to stop expecting things to be simple.

That mindset shift has saved me a ton of stress, not just with projects but everything.

Marriage. Parenting. Staying in shape. Starting something new.
It’s all harder than you want it to be.

But once you accept that?
You stop being surprised by the struggle.
You just show up and do the work.

Turns out, hard stuff gets easier when you quit pretending it shouldn’t be hard in the first place.

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Quote of the Week

Let’s double down on the point.
Most often, the best way forward is to just keep going.
Keep chopping. Keep hammering.
Over and over.

It’s simple.
But simple is hard.

Because repetition is boring. Progress feels slow.
And nobody claps for consistency.

But that’s where real strength is built.
Not in the breakthrough, but in the doing.

Show up.
Do the work.
Let that be enough.

The Real Shift

It’s not about making hard things feel easy.
It’s about not being shocked when they’re hard.

Because once you stop expecting quick and simple,
you free yourself up to keep going—even when it’s messy.

So here’s your challenge:

👉 This week, when something takes longer than it “should”… don’t fight it.
Breathe. Adjust. Keep swinging the hammer.

Not to impress anyone. Not to check a box.
But because it matters—and you’re building something that lasts.

The truth is, most strong men weren’t chasing ease.
They were just doing the work… one post, one wire, one day at a time.

Until next time—
Keep the fires burning,
— Clay

If you’re digging Campfire Gentleman, check out a few other newsletters I actually read and recommend. No fluff—just solid stuff from like-minded guys trying to build something that matters.