Raising kids is a strange endeavor.

They never seem to be paying attention when you want them to—but the second you drop an F-bomb? Locked in.

But every once in a while, they surprise you.

Out of nowhere, they do something or ask a question that stops you in your tracks. You can’t believe it. They were listening. They are watching.

And more than anything, they’re watching what you do over and over again.

That means they’re paying attention to how you approach work, how you handle stress, and—whether you realize it or not—how you chase (or don’t chase) your goals.

So the question is: What are you showing them?

Kids Learn More From What You Do Than What You Say

You tell your kids they can be anything they want.

That hard work pays off.

That they should dream big.

Now ask yourself: Do they see you doing any of that?

Because here’s the truth—kids don’t listen to words nearly as much as they watch actions.

If they see you dragging yourself to a job you hate, going through the motions, and never pushing yourself, that’s the real lesson they’ll absorb.

Not the pep talks.

And if you bitch at your kids for being glued to their phone while yours never leaves your hand? Guess what—they’ll follow your lead.

It’s like telling them to eat their vegetables while you’re crushing a bag of chips.

They hear what you say, but they follow what you do.

So if you want them to believe in chasing something meaningful, they need to see you chasing something meaningful.

What This Looks Like in Real Life

• If you’ve been talking about getting in shape, don’t just talk. Lace up your shoes and start running. Let them see you sweat.

• If you’ve always wanted to start your own business, work on it at the kitchen table where they can see you. Let them watch you figure things out.

• If you used to play guitar but haven’t touched it in years, pick it up. Let them see you struggle with the chords again.

🚨 Your kids don’t need to see a perfect dad. They need to see a dad who keeps striving. 🚨

🔥 Pick One Goal and Commit to It—In Front of Your Kids

Not someday. Not when life slows down.

Now.

Pick one thing—something that challenges you, stretches you—and start doing it where they can see you.

No speech required. No big announcement. Just let them watch their dad pushing himself.

Because if they don’t see it in you, why would they ever believe it for themselves?

Chasing Goals Makes You a Better Husband and Father

A man with a goal has fire. And that fire spreads.

Ever notice how when you’re working toward something that excites you—whether it’s getting stronger, building something, or learning a new skill—you show up differently?

You have more energy. More presence. More drive.

Now think about the times when you’ve had nothing pushing you forward.

You come home drained, mentally checked out, just going through the motions. You might not be a bad dad or husband, but you’re not fully there either.

And whether they say it or not, your family feels that.

🚨 Because here’s the hard truth—when a man stops striving, he starts fading. 🚨

Why This Matters for Your Family

Your wife and kids don’t need you to be rich, famous, or a world-class athlete.

But they do need to see you alive inside. Passionate about something. Fighting for something.

A disengaged man is like a fire that’s burned down to embers—technically still burning, but not giving off much heat.

A man with a goal is stoking the flames. And that warmth spreads to everyone around him.

Think About It:

🔥 A dad training for a half-marathon has more energy to wrestle with his kids at night.
🔥 A husband working on his side project has something to bring to the dinner table conversation besides work stress.
🔥 A man committed to growth isn’t just a provider—he’s a leader in his home.

Your wife didn’t marry a guy who was content to coast.

Your kids don’t need a dad who just exists.

🚨 They need a man on fire. 🚨

🔥 Set a Goal and Share It with Your Family

Tell them what you’re chasing. Make it real.

• “I’m going to run a 5K in three months.”

• “I’m finally writing that book I’ve been talking about for years.”

• “I’m cutting out junk food and getting in shape.”

It doesn’t matter what the goal is—what matters is that your family sees you going after something.

Because when they see you pushing yourself, they’ll push themselves too.

And when they see you fired up, they’ll feel the warmth of that fire.

Pursuing Something Difficult Teaches Grit & Resilience

Your kids need to see you struggle.

Not just winning. Not just looking like you’ve got it all together.

They need to see you grind, fail, and keep going.

Because life is going to punch them in the mouth one day.

And when that happens, they won’t remember some motivational speech you gave them.

🚨 They’ll remember watching you push through your own challenges. 🚨

Why Struggle Is the Best Teacher

Too many dads try to shield their kids from the hard stuff.

We want them to have a good life, so we make things easier for them.

But if they never see you struggle, they won’t know what to do when life gets tough.

🔥 Let Them See the Process

• Talk about your setbacks. “Man, that workout sucked. But I’ll be back at it tomorrow.”

• Share your struggles. “That client rejected my idea today. Gotta figure out a new angle.”

• Show them how you push forward. “I missed a day, but I’m not quitting.”

Let them see that growth isn’t about never failing.

It’s about failing, learning, and pushing forward anyway.

Your Kids Need to See You Striving

You don’t have to be the best.
You don’t have to be perfect.
You just have to be in the game.

Because at the end of the day, your kids don’t need a dad who used to want things.

They need a dad who still goes after things.

So what are they going to see you do?